Giordano Bruno is not Running for President

When I finally began thinking for myself—fuck everyone else—at the age of 20, finally separating from the religious indoctrination my parents never escaped from—and still have not—I read a lot about Galileo and Copernicus as visionary revolutionary types.

It took a while before I learned of someone who went further.

Giordano Bruno (Italian: [dʒorˈdano ˈbruno]; Latin: Iordanus Brunus Nolanus; 1548 – 17 February 1600), born Filippo Bruno, was an Italian Dominican friar, philosopher, mathematician, poet, and astrologer.[3] He is celebrated for his cosmological theories, which went even further than the then-novel Copernican model. He proposed that the stars were just distant suns surrounded by their own exoplanets and raised the possibility that these planets could even foster life of their own (a philosophical position known as cosmic pluralism). He also insisted that the universe is in fact infinite and could have no celestial body at its “center”.

Beginning in 1593, Bruno was tried for heresy by the Roman Inquisition on charges including denial of several core Catholic doctrines (including the Trinity, the divinity of Christ, the virginity of Mary, and Transubstantiation). Bruno’s pantheism was also a matter of grave concern.[4] The Inquisition found him guilty, and in 1600 he was burned at the stake in Rome’s Campo de’ Fiori. After his death he gained considerable fame, being particularly celebrated by 19th- and early 20th-century commentators who regarded him as a martyr for science,[5] though scholars emphasize that Bruno’s astronomical views were at most a small part of the theological and philosophical beliefs that led to his trial.[6][7][8] Bruno’s case is still considered a landmark in the history of free thought and the future of the emerging sciences.[9][10][11]

In addition to cosmology, Bruno also wrote extensively on the art of memory, a loosely organized group of mnemonic techniques and principles. Historian Frances Yates argues that Bruno was deeply influenced by Arab astrology, Neoplatonism, Renaissance Hermeticism, and legends surrounding the Egyptian god Thoth.[12] Other studies of Bruno have focused on his qualitative approach to mathematics and his application of the spatial concepts of geometry to language.[13]

But, just go vote for Hillary!, Rand Paul, or whoever the fuck; and be content that you’re voting for people of power, not of mind. Could anyone write an epitaph like that for a single person you’re aware of who died within the last 200 years? No. Not even close. doG doesn’t make people like that, anymore.

You all make me so laf and it’s so laf there’s no hope. I think I’ll move out of this reason-forsaken, awful excuse for a faux land of opportunity…that still suckers the 3rd world by come-tired-humble-massed-to-our-shores bromide that’s now an outright lie…and laf as it crumbles like the Roman Empire.

Never forget that the the view of any politician is no more than 8 years into to future. Well, not exactly true. Hillary’s—Der Rodham—was 25 years. She just must be president, you see. It’s very, very important to her.

Give her a basic cosmology quiz, unaided (an impossibility), I might even consider voting again.

Fuck all of you and your lining up to pick someone to rule you. Fucking pathetic.

Richard Nikoley

I'm Richard Nikoley. Free The Animal began in 2003 and as of 2021, contains 5,000 posts. I blog what I wish...from health, diet, and food to travel and lifestyle; to politics, social antagonism, expat-living location and time independent—while you sleep—income. I celebrate the audacity and hubris to live by your own exclusive authority and take your own chances. Read More


  1. Bret on May 2, 2015 at 04:08

    Martyrs make exponentially more progress than careerists. But almost nobody wants to die, or end their careers early, so the outlook is grim. Roman Empire indeed. It may take yet another hundred years or two, but it will happen.

    I want to think Rand Paul would be a good president, but he’s definitely got that careerist instinct. It would probably be Obama all over again, only with libertarian (vs commie) rhetoric. I don’t think we’ll get a chance to see, though. People seem to hate Rand Paul, even libertarians.

    • John on May 3, 2015 at 14:54

      We don’t hate, we’re just poinring out that there’s nothing partcularly libertarian about Rand Paul.

    • Bret on May 3, 2015 at 21:27

      I think that’s a bit of an exaggeration, John. He may not be as purely libertarian as others, but he’s one hell of a lot closer than the overhelming majority of Republicans, or Democrats for that matter.

      Seriously though, some libertarians act like they fucking hate the guy. Penn Jillette of all people on a recent podcast exclaimed “Fuck Rand Paul!” not because he wasn’t libertarian enough, but because he didn’t unequivocally instruct parents to vaccinate their children (I figure Penn has started smoking crack…only possible explanation for such a reaction, and I will be happy to discuss that opinion if anyone else wants to). Weird ass bullshit like that.

      Almost feels like we’re in the twilight zone, when libertarians reject the likeliest chance for (to underestimate) a 75% libertarian president, and with extreme prejudice and disgust I might add.

  2. Pat on May 2, 2015 at 09:48

    My vote is for Roger Bacon

  3. Luceo on May 4, 2015 at 07:41

    Within the last 200 years?

    Einstein, Sagan, Tesla, Jobs, Musk, Curie, just to name a few to start, unless actual martyrdom is a requirement. Great minds continue to emerge, but government and church need to get out of their fucking way.

  4. John Lash on May 9, 2015 at 09:42

    I love seeing anything about Bruno. The first I heard of him was in the novel Aegypt by John Crowley. It had a lot about the memory palace etc. that fascinated me. Some years later I heard the poem “What He Thought” by Heather McHugh and was transfixed by her imagery of Bruno.

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