scratch-mark

Chicken Crust Margherita Pizza — Ketogenic or Not?

IMG_0854

If you haven’t yet heard of the so-called Ketogenic Chicken Pizza Crust, you’ve been asleep. It’s all the rage.

Is it good? Yes, and far better than any of the other alternatives I’ve tried. I’ll get to that.

But let’s digress for a minute. Is it “ketogenic?” Fuck that. You know, this shit used to be a lot more rational. The alternatives—like cauliflower crust or meatza—were always touted as what they actually were: low-carb, grain-free versions of a popular comfort food. Now, that’s not good enough. Now, stuff has to be “ketogenic,” as though that means something. It doesn’t.

This does mean something, though: ketotardedness. Why? Because, very simply, for ‘tards: any food is ketogenic if you eat only that food, and little enough of it, and any food is fattening if you eat only that food and overeat enough of it.

While all successful fat-loss diets are necessarily highish-fat diets because you add your body fat consumption to your dietary fat consumption for total fat consumption, so too are all successful fat-loss diets ketogenic, since ketones are a byproduct of fat metabolism, both dietary and body fat. Macros are fucking irrelevant, except to the extent that you prefer one over another and that you are more likely to maintain a 600+ kcal deficit for the duration. It’s all that fucking matters and the rest is ketoshyster bullshit for their ketotarded marks.

There is no magic that makes any food ketogenic or fattening. How about I give you a recipe for a ketogenic cheesecake? Easy. It’s one whole cake and it comes out to 1,500 calories, You eat one whole cheesecake per day, but that’s all you eat, and all you need to do is be active enough to burn 2,100 calories or more each day.

Bingo! ketogenic Cheesecake. …Martin Berkhan would be so pleased.

Visit My New Facebook Group: “Richard Nikoley’s Ketotard Chronicles

The ingredients are simple and limited.

IMG_0850

2-10oz cans water packed chicken, two eggs, 2oz grated parmesan, 1-28oz can whole peeled tomatoes, 4 cloves garlic, 8 fresh basil leaves, 6oz fresh mozzarella

For the sauce, it’s enough for two, perhaps three, pizzas, so make it all up, sauce your pie, save the rest for the next time, which probably won’t be far off.

Take the big can of whole, peeled tomatoes and pulse in the blender a few times. Just pulse. Crush 4 large cloves of garlic and sauteé with about a tsp olive oil for a couple of minutes, until you feel the aroma.

IMG_0851

See? Little oil.

Then, add your pulsed sauce, the chopped basil leaves, and also: 1/2 tsp sugar, 1/4 tsp salt, and a pinch of black pepper. Simmer it, stirring occasionally, for about 45 minutes in order to reduce it to between 1 1/2 and 2 cups. The best way to tell it’s done is when the bubbles look like mud bubbles instead of water bubbles. Transfer it to a holding dish to cool.

IMG_0852

The crust is the tricky part and what you like is up to you. There are a number of chicken crust recipes, so Google and check them out. Most involve pre-cooking the crust quite a bit. Others call for first desiccating the chicken itself for a few minutes in the oven, then mixing it, then cooking it for about 20, then topping and cooking the pizza. For the first time out, I tried something I hadn’t seen in the other versions: a pizza stone.

First, drain the chicken well. Then mix in the two eggs and 2 ounces of grated fresh parmesan.

IMG_0853

At about the time you start cooking the sauce, put your oven to max (500-550) with the stone in the bottom third of the oven.

By the time your sauce is done and set in a holding dish and your “dough” is well mixed and mashed, your pizza stone will be hot as shit. You want to work rather quickly. Take out the stone, close the oven door, lower the oven to 500, and spread the “dough” on the stone, about 1/4″ thick.

Place it in the oven for about 6 minutes to pre-cook a bit. My hypothesis here is that because of the high and extreme heat and heat retention of the stone, it will serve to dry out the “dough” a lot faster than the methods with a lengthy pre-cook. You’ll get to decide for yourself.

Take it back out, close the door, sauce the pie, and arrange mozzarella. I think I was a bit heavy on the cheese.

Cook about 13-15 minutes, until the cheese bubbles and the tops of the bubbles brown. Remove it from the oven and try to get it off the stone soon. I found the crust slightly fragile, so I cut it into four pieces and plated it immediately.

Et voilà.

IMG_0855

And now we come to my favorite part. Dismissing all the rot about keto and carbs, the point of the pizza is PROTEIN! Yea! Fuckin’ PROTEIN, baby. And because it’s lean chicken, the fat is pretty reasonable. Over 50% of the calories are from protein.

Just look. I created a recipe in LoseIt!

IMG_0856

Dudes and dudesses: now here is a ketogenic pizza if you eat just one whole one per day and nothing else. And you know what? If you eat it half at a time, six hours apart, with its 152 grams of highly satiating protein, you just might have an easy time of it.

Richard Nikoley

I'm Richard Nikoley. Free The Animal began in 2003 and as of 2021, contains 5,000 posts. I blog what I wish...from health, diet, and food to travel and lifestyle; to politics, social antagonism, expat-living location and time independent—while you sleep—income. I celebrate the audacity and hubris to live by your own exclusive authority and take your own chances. Read More

23 Comments

  1. Jenn on June 20, 2017 at 00:53

    So… what’s the cheesecake recipe? lol j/k Pizza looks good.

  2. linkdrop on June 20, 2017 at 01:32

    “The researchers divided their subjects into two groups. Both groups went on a low calorie diet, one with higher levels of protein than the other. The higher-protein group experienced muscle gains — about 2.5 pounds — despite consuming insufficient energy, while the lower protein group did not add muscle.”

    https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/01/160127132741.htm

    • Richard Nikoley on June 20, 2017 at 06:16

      Been my experience these last two months, WEIGHT loss being hampered by lean gains. Muscle is about twice as dense as fat (same weight of fat takes up twice the volume).

      This is what is meant by recomposition, the scale doesn’t move as much as better fitting clothes and a better proportioned body would suggest.

      This is a good thing.

    • Robert on June 20, 2017 at 12:40

      Yes, and I’ve read that many weight loss schemes knowingly keep protein low, just so the scale would show more result. If your muscles waste away, your numbers on the scale will look great.

  3. linkdrop on June 21, 2017 at 01:12

    Hopefully you get affiliate sales from this link.

    • Richard Nikoley on June 21, 2017 at 06:25

      That’s not my affiliate link.

  4. Jackie D on June 20, 2017 at 11:23

    I keep kosher now, so am wondering how to make this compliant with that system. Have there been any nut cheeses that you’ve found particularly good? I feel like it’s hard to replicate that singular taste of real mozzarella and parmesan.

    I recently was served a quinoa dish (I wasn’t enthusiastic about it being on my plate) that reminded me so much of pizza. I think it was the mozzarella, parmesan, tomato and basil on top. Wondering if I could swap quinoa for the chicken and make a kosher version. Might have to experiment with this.

    • Hap on June 21, 2017 at 12:29

      jackie
      Keeping kosher keto is a bit of a problem. I use a product for a coconut milk based cheese (sliced) for my “cheeseburger”. I like it, but my dog, who loves real cheese and eats anything….spit it out.

      There is a line of very good nut cheese spreads etc called Treeline, no soy, no gluten, no carbs which has a Kosher hecksher (parve)

      I think I saw something on line for kosher keto recipes that looked very good.

      Experiment and let me know if you come up with something that can satisfy like RIchards’s pizza….

  5. Robert on June 20, 2017 at 12:45

    I’ve appreciated the latest posts with recipes and ideas. I did the cottage cheese and tuna today, great lunch. The ideas helps and inspires to try this protein hack.

    I’ve been experimenting with different things lately, but your results motivates me to really go for extremely high protein. Just to get the body recomp. Then back to peasant style diet.

    • Richard Nikoley on June 20, 2017 at 13:48

      I find it so remarkable, how some days, given 180-220g protein, like 800 calories, and I’m only at 1,500 of a 1,780 daily budget, just went over 2,500 burn on Fitbit and I have no desire for anything more.

      After that pizza last night around 8, I was done at about 1,700 total for the day, 2,500 burn. I just hit the 18 hour point and am finally hungry again, but I’m saying hell, about time I pushed it to at least 24 hours, since haven’t done that in quite a while. Perhaps I’ll push it to tomorrow morning.

  6. linkdrop on June 21, 2017 at 01:01

    #fakeketosis: you need to measure the beta hydroxybutyrate in your blood not the ketones in your urine to tell if you’re in #realketosis. Challenge the keto crowd to measure that!

    https://cluelessdoctors.com/2016/09/09/are-you-faking-ketosis

    • Richard Nikoley on June 21, 2017 at 06:25

      Don’t know who that is but at a glance, the article is a complete mess. Not even wrong.

  7. Waltermcc on June 21, 2017 at 12:09

    Richard,

    This is probably not the place, but thought What the Hell (have to try Facebook one day).

    I often go by Tom Naughton’s blog to see what he writes. There is a funny article about Vegan Toona. But, you have been removed from his Blogroll. Do not weep.

    It is a real shame that all these people who share a common ground with mocking American science have to put themselves into corners with no chance of escape.

    I look at you as living in a circular room, oval office or round space. There are no corners for you to back into. And if you do stroll into a rectangular room and find yourself being pushed into a corner, you always find a quick way out before you become trapped. Or come out swinging if you do get backed in too far.

    You would make an excellent scientist, but piss off most of your colleagues.

  8. Natasha on June 21, 2017 at 14:28

    Interesting as always Richard.

    So, calories and real food are your focus for weight loss? I have had trouble doing potato hack for more that a day or two. But, I’m still years ahead of the time that I couldn’t have potatoes without an immune system (crippled) response. I’m thrilled to do peasant food, it makes so much sense. But how often are you jumping up the protein? Just by how you feel? N.

    • Richard Nikoley on June 21, 2017 at 15:41

      For now, big protein every day except fasting days. I average 1g per pound of total body weight, so 180 – 190.

      Today will be 235g. Lowest day I recall since early April when I began this was 135.

    • thhq on June 22, 2017 at 14:03

      The dog looks skeptical. Give him a rat and see if he pees ketones.

  9. Limey on June 21, 2017 at 15:12

    Any chance we can get some stats on your progress and targets Richard? Weight, waist size, one rep max etc?

    • Richard Nikoley on June 21, 2017 at 15:43

      Yep, once I’m at goal. Should be sometime in September, perhaps earlier if the regular lap swimming and biking I start tomorrow helps, without making me too hungry.

    • Limey on June 21, 2017 at 16:15

      Yes. Be careful over exercising. For me, it nearly always leads to over eating. Maybe I should just try mega dosing on protein after exercise to thwart the over eating?

    • babyjesus on June 21, 2017 at 21:41

      Looking forward to the progress report! Can’t wait. Maybe send to Mark for a MDA Friday blog entry 🙂

    • thhq on June 22, 2017 at 14:05

      Exercise sucks the calories out in the middle of the night. The 2AM hungries in my case. I blow it off, as it’s been going on for 10 years.

  10. hap on June 22, 2017 at 11:08

    So Mark did come out with a Keto article as prologue to Keto book……with the first installment cautioning against blanket use of ketogenic diet.

  11. David on June 24, 2017 at 20:49

    I think the following is the best low-carb pizza recipe I’ve found. As a diabetic, I’ve looked for years for a tasty pizza recipe. I have not tried the chicken one above yet, but previous chicken crusted pizzas I have tried wind up not tasting like pizza. I love the egg and cheese crust on this one.

    https://www.dietdoctor.com/recipes/lchf-pizza

Leave a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

YouTube1k
YouTube
Pinterest118k
Pinterest
fb-share-icon
40
45
Follow by Email8k
RSS780